Week 1 of the restart

So... I weighed in on Saturday.... I'm down 4.2 lbs.

I like playing in the sandbox!

Here were the challenges of the week:

1. Holidays. I did really well and stuck to the week 1 book, religiously, for most of the week.
2. Day trip on Wednesday - ended up at Swiss Chalet for supper. I didn't have my 'Dining Out' book with so I sat down, asked for a glass of water and a nutritional guide. Chose my food based on that. I ate a delicious dinner for 7.5 pts.
3. Pot Luck on Thursday evening with friends. I took a green salad and fat free dressings. Stayed within my points and had fresh fruit for dessert.
4. Beach day on Friday. Seriously. Went to the beach (sans bathing suit) and relaxed. I packed us a nice picnic lunch and we just had a delightful afternoon in Cobourg.
5. Dinner Friday evening with friends on Friday - my big BLOW. Nothing was on plan. I tried hard to limit portions and the variety of what I was eating. Dinner lasted from 6:30 to 10:30.... then we sat outside for another hour after that. I knew when I got home (around midnight) that I was no where NEAR plan.

So, Friday evening discouraged me. I had been down more earlier in the week but I knew that eating such rich foods late at night was going to play with my numbers. ARGH! It did. However, I was totally successful the rest of the week, so my 4.2 lbs is a major victory!

Celebrate.

Now, week 2 of week 1. Yes, I'm repeating it.

So far... it's sunday and I've already had a few challenges.

• Last night we had company for dinner, we bbq'd steak. I weighed my beef portion and only had 4oz. Success.
  
• Dessert was angel food cake, strawberries, whipped cream. I didn't have the cream. Success.
• Breakfast was shredded wheat, skim milk, blueberries. Success
• Lunch today was a hot dog... FAIL
• Supper tonight was Potato Chowder (a weight watchers week 1 recipe) Success
• snacks today were: an apple, some grapes, a granola bar. I'd say Success, right?

The week will continue - as I head back to work after 2 weeks off.
I'll let you know how it goes.... I'll have to carefully plan my meals.

Here I go.....

Playing in the Sandbox

After the beach analogy yesterday, thought I'd continue for a bit....

Boundaries are good. They provide safety. This week, I've decided to play not on the beach but safely within the sandbox. Here, there are no waves to destroy what i'm building. Here, it's fun and easy.

Day 2 of the new improved me. So far so good. Playing in the sandbox is good. It's safe.
Yesterday I stayed on plan (except for dessert for supper.... don't even ask!) We had dinner at a friend's house - a friend who knew I was on Weight Watchers and cooked a "ww friendly" meal, or so she thought. So, we had this delicious chicken cooked on the rotisserie of their bbq. Two chickens actually, for 5 people. When the pieces were passed around on a platter, I chose a breast. Immediately I took of the wing and handed it to my husband. Then before I got to taste the wonderful crisp skin, I took it off! The chicken beneath was delicious. And enough. The meal was served with three different salads, one a potatoe salad made with a vinegar dressing rather than mayo! Thanks Vicki! You're great! The other two salads consisted of a green leafy salad with lots of delicious veggies in it (which I had with a fat free dressing) and a broccoli/cabbage salad with cranberries and *gulp* bacon! I picked out the bacon. The dressing was a fat free based dressing (I was told!) So far, so good. I had one piece of bread - homemade by my hostess - spelt bread with flax seed. Delicious although rather dense. I did have 1 tsp of butter with it... it needed it! Now, the dessert.... sigh... a frozen concoction made up of a graham crust, topped with sliced banana, then vanilla ice cream, and finally a fudge topping (melted chocolate chips, sweetened condensed milk, etc.sigh) all frozen and cut into squares. I had one square, the smallest one that she cut. I have no idea how to count that. Really. So I asked her for the recipe - that way I can figure it out and record it under my flex points for the week.

That was it. No extras. I drank water with my meal. I feel all in all, I had a successful rebirth in the sandbox!

Today even better. Trish (at WW) suggested that for the next two weeks I use the preplanned menus in the week 1 book. I am. this morning I choose a breakfast off the list - 1 cup fat free plain yogurt with 1 cup sliced strawberries. I thought I'd be starving afterwards. I wasn't. For lunch, I choose 1 cup of black bean soup - very delicious and very low in both fat and points (2 pts) while very high in fibre. That was followed with another cup of plain fat free yogurt and 1 sliced banana. Again, I was satisfied! I've planned out dinner for tonight - Teriyaki Pork tenderloin, baked sweet potato, broccoli. (8 pts). for my 'snack' I'm going to have sliced strawberries (1 cup) with angel food cake (2 points) for a 3 point snack (or dessert) after dinner. total points for today = 20.

Now, I am sitting and enjoying a cup of herbal tea.
I am enjoying the safety of the sandbox. I'll play here all week.

Next week, I may take a step outside the sandbox and plan my own meals again. But for now, it's a no brainer. And I need that! The sand is warm and inviting... and very satisfying. Just one comment....

I think I may have left my pail and shovel at the beach!

A line in the sand.....

As a child I loved going to the beach, playing in the sand, building castles, and having fun. The sand nearest the water was the best because it was cool on your feet and you could really dig deep without the sides caving in. Not much effort was needed! The dry sand wasn't as much fun - it was hot and dry, and it required work! You couldn't build with it unless you added water But oh, the wet sand.... it was a delight. Sometimes you would get your 'castle' almost to the place where it was just about perfect... just that one more bit and it would be there! Inevitably, a wave would sweep ashore and wash away the castle. I remember just sitting in the wet sand, where my beautiful castle had once been, crying. The problem is that I built my sand castle too close to the water line, too close to where 'danger' would come and take it away. If I had just used the other sand location - the one a little further away from the waterline - my castle would be safe! I'd dig through the dry sand - the hard work - and then get to the cooler and wetter sand below! How satisfying it felt to build my castle on a firmer foundation! When the waves did come often just a little water would wear away a corner of the castle, but the castle stood!!

Sometimes I feel like I'm a sand castle. I work on something until I just about get it right and then a giant wave comes in and washes my efforts away. These past two weeks have been just like that for me. Okay, truthfully, it's been more than two weeks, but lets not quibble over timelines! The problem is that I build my 'weight loss' sand castle too close to the waterline. In weight loss terms, I mean that I like the fast easy route! But with the fast easy track it means that danger is always close by because I'm always along the waterline, the danger zone, where temptations lurk waiting to wash away my efforts. I know the dangers are there but I still flirt with the line! Then, when a wave comes in - holidays, business trips, backyard bbq's, special events - I allow the wave to wash away everything I've been working toward. And I sit and cry! If I could only learn to plan better, just like the sand castle experiment as a child, then when the waves come (and they will come!) the work that I've done won't be totally lost, maybe just a tiny corner (a pound? pound and a half?) rather than the heartbreaking gain that makes you want to sit and cry!

This week, a line has been drawn in the sand! I'm starting fresh and in a place where I can see - truly see - where the waves are and learn to steer clear! This week, my castle gets built - starting on a much firmer foundation. This week, I won't allow the waves to destroy me! I've prepared in advance. I've got a plan. I've got enthusiasm back. I've got...

oh wait..... Just one problem.... I've got some sand in my bathing suit! Dang!

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!

Ever wondered what happens when you fall off the "food" wagon? Well, you lie in a pool of self-pity screaming that you'd pick yourself up if you could!

My week has been full of culinary mishaps... red meat three times (steak, steak, and um, steak), high fatty foods, and a touch of alcohol. So, yes, I've fallen.... and I'm trying desperately now to get up on to my feet again and walk! Walk, that is, straight to my Weight Watchers meeting on Saturday. Honestly, there are days I really don't want to go. I get so discouraged. Why am I paying all this money to just sit around and eat whatever passes by me? I don't know. I really don't know.

I weighed myself last night, I'm back to my starting weight again. Oh, and the ultimate self-insult? I was trying on a pair of shoes today and happened to be seated right in front of a mirror. As I struggled to lift my fat leg up to take off my running shoe (I use the term "running" very loosely here), I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I was shocked. Those could NOT be my legs! Someone must have switched them for a fat person's legs when I was sleeping! Yes, obviously that is what happened! Alas, they were my legs and I was disgusted by what I saw.

So I came in to work, had my fat free yogurt, three bottles of water... and don't ask what else....

I'll trudge on to WW in the morning, face the music, face myself (the much harsher critic) and get on with it. This has got to end! Today!

.... and yes, I bought the most beautiful pair of shoes today!

The day had to have some redeeming quality to it!